Here’s a fabulous poem….formatting just slightly different than the original.
Hangman
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First, a box for the scaffold. Next a pole, hooked
where the noose will go. Then seven spaces underneath,
like the broken centerline the father will cross when he feels
under the seat for the bottle, because it is a long way to town,
the road a running scar through the dense woods, and you
watching hard in the dark like he tells you for something
that might run out, suicidal. Ready you call, and he says E,
like you knew he would, and you make a circle, happy
for this word without an e because the father is the best
driver in the world, able to steer with just one knee,
or a thumb looped through the wheel. R, he says, and T!,
and you mark these next to the head, like the first dumb
thoughts of a man with only a straight line for a body
and another for a leg, a man who will probably be dead soon,
or else missing something important—hands, maybe, or a nose—
something he needs to live. Y comes next, an odd choice
you think so you ask why y? and he says because because,
and you both laugh, washed in the headlights that slice
through the cab like a quick and painless incision, knowing
one day, after you have a name for it, that this is joy—
tucked safe in the kerosene smell of bourbon that is the sweet,
sharp spoor of the father—how you know you could find him
if he were lost in these woods, the way animals know their own
kind, could save him with your amazing sense of smell.
H-I-J-K! he shouts, and you add ears because it looks bad
for the hanged man, the sad stick body and curving frown,
the way you will picture the father thirty years later, after
they find him and the coroner tells you not to look. O he says,
and there are two of these—not together as in booze or doom—
but separated, you know, by l and c, which, when you say it fast,
sounds like luck luck, what you wish now for the father who loves
to win and for the condemned man, who might be innocent after all,
his fate hanging on the alphabet and on this word you’ve been saving
for so long. S is for sorry, as in Sorry there is no S, and F is for fireball,
which happens in movies when they crash through the guardrail
and tumble down the canyon because the father is not at the wheel,
but some bank robber who gets what he deserves, and A is for the ashes
that are left, white and clean, dropping straight down through your hands
into the bay. In the midst of life we are in death, each in our little car,
driving though the long day and the long night till we get
where we’re going. G, he says, quietly, lighting a cigarette, and because
you agreed on no fingers you hang a heart on the skinny chest like a note
left on a pole, and he can still get it you know he can if he just concentrates,
so you hand him the bottle, taking the wheel as he leans back, eyes closed,
thinking. N goddammit! he says finally and you say Yes, yes, then silently,
like a prayer: L is for lava that flows through from the molten secret heart of the world,
down the mountain, toward the slumbering village. Then stops. The way
the father stops dead—Volcano!—in the middle of the road, then peels off
grinning, the lights of the town coming into view, the man on the page
safe now, hanging by an eyebrow.
—Jennifer Maier
(first published in New Letters)